Where Aren't They Now: 72

Mars Franklin ate 49 eggs.


















This is a "lightning round" guest post by Ben Compton. See Monday's post for a better explanation of my cop out!

Where Aren't They Now: 71

Jimmy Williams-Chandler, made his first longboard out of his father's coffinwood and pure, American gumption. Went to Hawaii to teach people how to surf. Found true love while pretending to paddle out to catch a wave for an octogenarian named Milfred.














This is a "lightning round" guest post by Ben Compton. See Monday's post for a better explanation of my cop out!

Where Aren't They Now: 70

Cindy Catchersmith wouldn't shut up about her fucking horse.

















This is a "lightning round" guest post by Ben Compton. See Monday's post for a better explanation of my cop out!

Where Aren't They Now: 69

Charles Weatherheimer. Lost his right hand in a car accident when he was six. Got kicked out of cub scouts for telling the other kids that "god took my hand because of the terrible things I did amongst the Webelos."
















This is a "lightning round" guest post by Ben Compton. See Monday's post for a better explanation of my cop out!

Introducing the "lightning round"

Late Sunday night I told my friend Ben that I was having a hard time getting moving with Where Aren't They Now. Quick as lightning, Ben wrote me up 4 short-and-sweet guest posts that you'll be seeing this week as I attempt to get back on the horse.

I'm calling it a "lightning round." You can call it a "cop out." Something > nothing, and Ben's posts > something. Math!

If you want to take a look/listen at other creative projects that are otherwise consuming me, make sure that you listen to Ben and my podcast, Arrive Having Eaten, as well as my own audio poetry project.

And if that ain't enough Erica for you, we might need to talk.

Where Aren't They Now: This Dude Looks Like Katie Rice

I think I'm going to take a break this week, for two reasons:

1. My feed counter keeps saying that 0 people are reading, which can't be far from the truth, and

2. This guy looks so much like cartoonist Katie Rice that it's freaking me quite-a-bit out.

I'm having a difficult time finding a head-on picture of Katie Rice, but try this one or this one or this one.

Where Aren't They Now: 67

Jan-- many years after this photo was taken-- became the first female rapper to sport an all-diamond grill.

It wasn't the type of grill which you would recognize today. Jan actually had bits of diamond implanted into each and every one of her teeth. The diamonds were not removable, of course, but did no lasting damage. If anything, they made food easier to chew.

And, of course, amassed some serious street cred.

Where Aren't They Now: 66

Rae was raised by birds.

Sure, it was unlikely that a group of birds would take in a human infant.

And sure, birds and humans share very little in common socially.

Sure, Rae had a difficult time transitioning into the human world once she came of age in her own little Jungle Book life.

Sure, the birds were a little hurt when she abandoned them and went on to become a local news anchor.

Stranger things have happened.

Where Aren't They Now: 65

Jed has an impressive collection of cardboard cutouts of himself.

He spent the entire school year pranking people when he was a sophomore in high school. By then he had 15 full-size cutouts of himself, in various outfits and positions. Jed loved to position them in realistic places, then watch from afar as people began to interact with him.

This is a photo of one of the cutouts, actually. We discovered that after the picture was already taken.

Where Aren't They Now: 64

Chip is antidextrous.

You may be more familiar with antidexterity's counterpart, ambidexterity. While people who exhibit ambidexterity can use both hands with equal agility, the antidextrous, such as Chip, are equally clumsy with both.

This is not a matter of simply being a klutz-- Chip's brain actually prefers not to use either hand. It takes great force of will for Chip to pick things up, point to things, catch a football. High fives are completely out of the question.

Where Aren't They Now: 63

Phyllis is afraid of her own shadow.

She's been diagnosed with acute agoraphobia, but it's much more severe than that. Even within her own house, she lives in fear.

She developed an intricate lighting system within her home which shines from as many points as possible at once, casting almost no shadow. Phyllis is working on a mobile unit that will allow her to take her lights with her, so that she might experience life again.